Parks

So I've discovered that I love being in a park or in any sort of remotely park-like area I guess, but parks specifically because such interesting and happy events are always happening in every direction.

One of my favorite memories is just walking down a busy beach when I was in Hawaii alone and watching. Of course, the beauty of Hawaii does not exist in Austin, and the happenings typically much less entertaining, but it's the joy of seeing such joyful groups of people together without worries or inhibitions. I enjoy parks i think for the same reason I love This American Life (www.thisamericanlife.org) stories - little embarrassing, comical, or nonsensical stories and events, seemingly trivial, but universal and moving.

A park is like a Bizarro mall.
Reason 1: I hate malls. I love parks.
Reason 2: Groups get along better in parks than in malls. There's no real agenda most of the time and everything is just simpler, so you hardly ever see parents yelling at their children or people arguing over where to go. Even when kids do something stupid that would normally be chided, parents can look around and see for one, other children likely doing somehting more worthy of their chiding like say well, at least he's not eating a bug like that kid by the lake...or worse, sitting reading a book like that long-haired, girly-looking teenager on the bench. The other reason is simply because of the "it's cool" environment parks have. Anything goes in a park, as long as it's family friendly. There are no rules (except maybe keep off the grass and certain common sense codes, in addition to what is found in our state's and our nation's constitution of course) in a park. Furthermore in malls children must be constantly told what they cannot have, but in a park, all that is nature is for the taking!
Reason 3: While mall-shopping ventures made at anytime but Christmas are usually for the purpose of improving style or chic, there is no almost no attention paid whatsoever to one's appearance in a park, let alone one's style. Of course, if you're the lonely wandering poet or would like to be, you might get some mysterious and deep points. And I'm sure there are 100 other self-absorbed characters ambling about as well, but they are largely drowned out. My primary evidence for the case I made earlier is with the runners. These people seemingly publicly degrade themselves - they're not looking for any sort of points. I mean, if you're going to go running to try to attract the ladies or gentlemen, you'll more than likely be wholly out of luck. Unless you're some fine Aphrodite or Andrew Roberts, you're going to be truly tired after maybe 5, 10, 20, or 60 minutes for the true athletes, and at some point you're going to get that kind of tired where your muscle control begins to slow and your arms just flop about before you. Call it sick pleasure, but I enjoy seeing these people, not knowing if they've just run 10 miles or 10 feet, but just seeing the exhaustion that can almost say nothing but, I came outside for the fresh air and the exercise.
Reason 4: Wildlife, the great outdoors
(And yes, I do understand that this is a pointless and really quite absurd comparison, but so it is and so it shall be. I could almost make the same comparisons between Disneyworld and a park. In truth, I'm just pro the old American outdoors, or what we can still grasp of it, and anti lesser types of fun and adventure in the commercial world. Plus, I'm not a big fan of shopping.)


Anyway, I thought I would just relay some of the silly smile-worthy events I've had at my last two trips down to the "Austin Lake" that is actually as I am informed the (lesser) Colorado River partitioned off by dams into small "lakes" (or "lochs" for my loyal Scottish readers).

Last trip of last semester:
(prepark) Underneath a bridge, I walk by graffiti of a purple octopus with its tentacles fluttering out in every direction with the words "whichever way the wind blows" sprayed over it

I see my first excited game of frolf in action, with a man obviously taking the sport too seriously, and the female with him simply laughing at his efforts.

Children ride about on horses, beaming, in a clearing nearby the frolfers

A couple speaking their native (oriental) language joyfully to one another while watching a flock of birds fly by

Like something out of Sleeping Beauty or some other fantasy of the sort, a Spanish family sits downhill from me on and around a stump (which at first upset me because I had made my mind up to read on that very stump) and begin to throw some sort of food on the ground around them, and at least 10 squirrels run down the hill to them without hesitation - family smiles and laughs happily as they now handfeed the squirrels, teaching their youngest daughter to for the first time - she looks at first terrified and struggles to keep her eyes open even, but the squirrel pecks the morsel away and her face lights up

A young woman struck by the beauty of the beginning sunset at her right, slowly collides with the man she is with and after a laugh, the two set down bikes and watch it together

Boy finds tennis ball, looks cautiously all around him and sees that it is now his - takes ball happily and tosses it high in the air - ball lands in stream - boy looks confused - boy prances happily along again beside his mother

Spanish Americans rock out to some Latina tunes underneath bridge - I contemplate joining, fear being ostracized and continue walking

At least once every 10-20 minutes, kids are wildly excited by the sight of ducks


Today's trip:

Parked at CVS after church and walked towards the lake, immediately run into a homeless man? and an out-of-gas driver struggling to push a car up to the nearby gas station - help out (regrettably we're all in this together somehow plays momentarily in my head)

Family of four in a plastic red canoe seem to be struggling as the two young boys have set their minds on oaring for land and the parents try to keep them out at sea - woman in front of me calls out to them "you all look like you've got it under control" - oldest boy yells "We're headeded for SHE-ORE!"

Man calmly explains to woman the absurdity of bears being able to climb trees

I'm walking on a wide path with no figures nearby in front or behind - a young Spanish girl accidentally? runs over my leg with her tiny pink barbie bike tire. I turn around and look at her - her eyes are wide and her face emotionless, then a mischievous smile before she speeds past me

Boy follows dog into lake

Countless families engaging in the practice of Stroller Running - a couple gasping out breaths of conversation to each other as one pushes their infant along with them in its stroller

Something that is not worth your time

This is what I wrote when I woke up for the second time this morning. There's no real great profundity to it, but feel free to apply your very own dream analyses if you wish. It was the first non-nightmare I've had in quite awhile so it was quite exciting to me. Also, keep in mind that this was written immediately upon waking and I have edited hardly at all, so absurd butchery of the English language may have been done. Forgive me.

I wish I would have written this dream down earlier (8:18 am January 23, 2009) –

Part 1: The Lovely Bakress and the Troll

I went to a cooking competition with my mom. It was also an academic contest that I in the dream had apparently been to the year before as one 20-something-year-old bespectacled boy reminded me with short brown slightly curly hair, and it had been the best food I'd ever eaten. He asked me if I had liked the eggs last time and I at first couldn't remember and just told him empty words like "It wasn't not delicious. I remember it wasn’t the greatest thing in the world, but I really did like it." He also congratulated me on this time being a part of the baking part of the competition and asked me how many eggs he thought we'd need. "Do you think 15 will be enough?" I did the math in my head with the number of people believed to be coming and the number was significantly higher, but I just told him, "probably."

He then remembered that I hadn't yet met my cooking partner and excitedly hurried me to meet her. However, we got stopped along the way by a fairly large woman (who looked extremely similar to my high school creative writing teacher) who introduced herself as the cooking event's coordinator. She redirected us to the before-competition meal. She separated me from my glasses-wearing friend and set us at our assigned seats. For that matter, I have no idea how we were logically arranged unless a random number generator was involved because I was nearly as far away as possible from my mother on the other side of the round table, seating around 25-30. I was between two boys that seemed to be young junior highers or younger. Unless they were child cooking proteges, which would seem to me to be quite dangerous and bad parenting to allow such a dangerous hobby at such an age. Knives and fire typically bring about unfavorable results for junior high boys The two seemed to be longtime friends and kept talking over me, well not over me, they were practically hobbits, but I just sat and watched my mother as I waited for the food. When the first plate arrived, I knew that this was to be an odd meal. The first played that was bought out was a giant decorated slab of red meat. They placed it right in front of my mother. The possibilities for a humorous joke to win the young ones over seemed endless in this situation but I settled on silly/shock value in saying something about how I thought it was strange that they actually caught and cooked a whole coyote and managed to keep it all in one piece. "No way!" the kids said in disbelief, but immediately returned to their conversation and i waited as the plates of strange exotic foods were brought in from every side.

Eventually somehow we made it through the meal, the director said something about the contest and encouraged us all to prepare for the competition. The majority of people went off to go shower and I agreed to meet my friend just outside the showers. I went in to take one myself, but the terribly great population of the communal male showers overwhelmed me and I turned around to walk right back out. Somehow though the entrance had been moved or closed off so I had to venture through halls of showers until I could finally make my escape, eyes still to the floor. I ran into my friend just outside of the building who said impatiently that he'd been waiting for me, as if he had something pressing to tell me. He told me quickly about how the event coordinator would be trying to get him and my partner's, so his and my team, out of the competition. Of course, dramatic timing brought the woman out to us just as a curse at her was uttered by my friend. She flamed up and immediately proclaimed his discharge from the cooking competition. I wandered back to the building in which the competition was to start in a few hours. I found out that the children to young adults were in one competition and the adults in the other, so I walked upstairs to a room of loud young strangers. Trudging about the room in search of my yet unidentified partner, I eventually walked up to our long cooking counter and glanced at what all was there. Not exactly knowing why I was there and trying to recall how I had gotten myself involved in this as I glanced around at all the cooking utensils I didn't know how to use and foreign spices, I leaned down and rested my forearms on the table and prepared to wait everything out. I heard a voice to my right and turned my head questioningly, "Do you think 15 eggs will be enough?" The ridiculous underestimate of the amount and the fact that no one seemed to know elementary math, or at least the normal ratio of eggs to person was not lost on me, I even decided in that moment that maybe I was only in the competition because I was in some country that did not believe in mathematics and I was a necessary commodity, but I only said, "People seem to be asking me that question a lot." Then it dawned on me that this must be my partner. She was really a beautiful girl, fairly tall, my age plus or minus a year, and with curly red hair in a ponytail, and then I realized why my pal had been so eager to introduce me to her. Two beautiful. people together...just kidding.

We talked together about the absurdity of the contest and when she began to talk about how she loved cooking and aspired to chef greatness, I admitted that I had really never cooked in my life, besides the occasional cake and poptarts. She laughed and agreed to tell me about how to cook our food list, as soon as we made it. We began to talk about ideas, she in actuality coming up with all of the good ideas of course. I was mainly only there to smile and laugh with her excitability upon coming to a great idea.

We had nearly completed our item list when the coordinator came in and immediately began to rebuke all of the cooks for standing around and not working. She raved about how they may not even hold a competition this year because of our disrespectful attitude towards the sport (and I believed she used the word tomfoolery). My partner immediately became upset and defensive. Ma’am, we have just spent the last hour coming up with our menu, and I know that everyone around here has at least spent some amount of time in mental preparation. You've kept us up here for hours without instruction, it's only natural. (She said something to that effect - I doubt I remember all her words accurately). The coordinator only contorted her face and spat out a few insults at the girl, most of which were completely unfounded and she turned to walk back out, surely with the intention of disqualifying her as my earlier friend had warned. I decided that I wasn't going to let that happen with I'm sure some amount of heroism or romanticism in my head in confronting the ogress for the honor of my partner, who had begun to tear up, but mainly for the simple reasons that I had no business being there at a cooking contest and I had a good deal of pent up anger at this woman by now. I yelled something about how she was an unfit judge and jury in this competition and went on until she cut me off, screaming disqualifications. My mother too was soon after disqualified (as I had a ride home), likely for being an unfit mother or some like business. My partner hugged me goodbye and I wished her luck and I was on my way. I spent the ride home apologizing to my mother who had greatly desired to compete, and that part of the dream ended with us driving in silence and wondering how the competition went without us.

Long Blogless Month Fulfilled

One luminary clock against the sky
Proclaimed the time was neither wrong nor right.
I have been one acquainted with the night.

That for which I am currently most proud is a fledgling healthy sleep schedule I've begun to cultivate. I've waged a battle against myself mind, body, and soul to wake myself up early this past week, ignoring my Sleepy Carl who tells me time and time again that life is simply better in bed. I decided last semester that I'd start waking up early mornings primarily to biopsychological benefits of sunlight. Depressive symptoms may be alleviated by sunlight apparently and though I don't know why this is, I'm all for the idea of being happier just by being awake at a certain time. Denying myself such happiness to stay up in order to watch television shows I don't even particularly like or to waste time on the computer simply seems ludicrous.

There is a downside for me here still though. Tragically, I must forsake the late night in order to embrace dawn. I've always loved the night, but it just doesn't feel the same here. For one, I have a roommate who is nearly always awake as well, and even if he's not there's the sound of steady breathing, rising and falling at all times. I like often to be alone and this is a near impossibility in my single room dorm without (legal) roof access, with a great deal of trouble having to be taken to prepare to travel outdoors. I can't wander about the hallways or linger in any other rooms alone as I could in my (completely oversized) house in Houston. From my window I only overlook a street and a fraternity, and the grand ole city of blaring lights. The issue really though is that with the combination of the craziness of Austin and the thousands of college students, night lacks here the peace that it held in Houston. The night is of course still interesting of course and I still take random just-asking-to-get-robbed strolls through the city and surrounding parks at absurd hours, but for quite different reasons. Back home, I would go out late night walking or yogging if I needed to relieve stress, reflect, or just observe the beauty of the night, or however much of it existed in muggy Houston. Here these reasons still exist, but unless out in the parks, there are the masses of Austin's night life stumblers, concert-goers, and generally weird people to observe. There is such a strange collection of people in this city and observation breeds contemplation. I take great pleasure in these Austin walks, but I doubt they'll ever replace the joy found in the Houston ones.

I so far have greatly enjoyed punishing myself by waking up from between 7 and 8 when the city remains asleep. I plan to go to breakfast at our cafeteria every morning this semester (both to have a specific purpose to get up and to start spending the $1200 or so I have to exhaust in the next few months) and as I attempt to settle my internal clock on waking closer to 7 or slightly earlier, I hope to take some morning strolls. The allure of nightstrolling still exists here in the mornings, when the city is asleep and hung over. Of course, there are still the devoted dogwalkers and 8 o'clock classers that wander about, but for the most part, the city remains tranquil and in general much more tolerable in my opinion. A certain amount of pride in for the first time taking control of my sleeping habits exists as well. I feel almost responsible for once. Ahh the beginnings of maturity...I must be doing a poor job of being a college student.

More than anything, I feel the new normal-hours-keeping Kyle kind of represents in my mind starting fresh again. Last semester was not a favorite of mine and I hope to take more from my college experience and decipher a clearer direction for my life this year.

Goodbye late nights. I'm sure we'll still hang out now and then, but I think that we should start seeing other people. (And for anyone observant enough to notice that I'm posting this at 3:21 am...this is an exceptional day. I've already slept a lot today by accident, and I shouldn't have any problem waking up for breakfast tomorrow.)